Tips on talking with an elderly family member or friend when you think it’s no longer safe for them to drive.
The topic of driving and driving safety with an elderly family member or friend can be a sensitive one. However, it is crucial to address it when you believe safety on the road may be at risk. Here are some tips on how to approach this conversation, including how to spot the signs that someone may no longer be safe behind the wheel.
Observe their driving behaviour.
Look for signs of confusion, slower reaction times, failure to obey traffic rules, getting lost in familiar areas, or frequent near-misses.
Discuss their health
Certain medical conditions or medications can impair driving abilities. It’s essential to ensure they’re aware of the potential risks.
Be respectful and empathetic
Approach the conversation with respect and empathy and acknowledge their independence and the emotional significance of driving. Show understanding and compassion, as giving up driving can be emotionally challenging.
Choose the right time and place.
Find a comfortable and private setting for the conversation. Avoid discussing the matter in front of other family members or friends, as it can cause embarrassment or defensiveness.
Use specific examples
Instead of making general statements, use specific incidents or observations to illustrate your concerns. This approach can make the conversation more concrete and less accusatory.
Offer alternative transportation options.
Assure your loved one that you will help them find alternative ways to maintain their independence, such as arranging rides with family members, using public transportation, or exploring local senior transportation services.
Engage other family members or friends.
Enlist the support of other family members or friends who may have noticed similar concerns; this can help validate your observations and create a united front in approaching the topic.
Suggest a driving assessment.
Recommend that they undergo a driving evaluation from a certified driving instructor or occupational therapist. An objective assessment of their driving abilities can provide a more neutral way to discuss the matter.
Be patient and understanding.
Understand that your loved one may need time to process the information and the idea of giving up driving. Avoid pressure and be patient throughout the process.
Focus on their safety and the safety of others.
Emphasise that your primary concern is their safety and the safety of others on the road. Reinforce that making this decision is about ensuring their well-being.
Following the advice above will help you address the issue confidently and ensure everyone is respected, supported and understood.